Micro Manage This!

I despise the uber-perky, I am always right pharmacist that micro manages everything. I worked with one of those last week. She really pissed me off.

1. Do not treat me like a 5-year old because I speak very little Spanish. I have worked in many areas where most of the patients only speak Spanish. I can hold my own quite well and can work circles around you as long as I have a fluent tech to explain the intricacies of insurance rejections. It is also rude of you to assume that none of these patients understand a lick of English. Many understand far more than you think they do and are quite funny when I apologize for my Spanish not being so great. The tech said my pronunciations are good and she understood everything I said. I only had 3 patients I needed a full translation for and only a couple times did I ask the patient to repeat what they said slower because it takes me a minute to do the translation in my head and if they talk too fast I miss some things.

2. I do not appreciate your two-faced attitude toward your technicians. The whole paging the store manager to call the tech and then telling him to write her up for being an hour late because you wanted her to work on the warehouse totes for an hour even though the schedule on the wall was not correct. You then proceeded to chastise her over the hour and then kiss her ass like she is your best friend the rest of the day. I don't like your dog and pony show.

3. I do not appreciate your assumption that I am like the sh*tty floaters that just stand or sit around all day and do the minimal amount of work. I actually do what needs to be done because I am there and getting paid quite handsomely to do so. The tech you chastised and I had over 2 hours to waste after we had EVERYTHING else done that we could find to do, including counting down the extra banks.

4. I do not appreciate every time you so rudely impose yourself into the middle of my patient consultation. I don't care what papers you have read or what your personal preferences are. I have my products of choice and it was my consultation. If there were no surveillance cameras I probably would have stabbed you with a spatula repeatedly. You were very unprofessional.

5. Do not treat me like a child because I look young. I have over a decade in as a pharmacist and was a student intern for a few years prior. My youthful visage only shows that I am aging much better than you are and won't need that laser skin resurfacing treatment for at least 15 more years or half as much makeup as you cake on to cover your micro-manager crow's feet and furrows.

6. Taking a few years off to raise your child does not make you any better than anyone else. Most people do not have the luxury of taking a few years off work because they have bills to pay and aren't in a fiduciary position to do so. You are just a self important douche and your child will grow to resent you and maybe even poison you for the inheritance because I am sure you treat your family just as wonderfully as you treat your co-workers.

Wow, I could probably add several more items to the list but as I am a polite blogger I try to keep the posts short and sweet though I tend to ramble on. I will leave you with a thought I had last night at the Dethklok, Mastodon concert: I am qualified to be a Kloketeer on the STD/Skank patrol. Maybe that is the job I should apply for. At least I would get to tour with the bands and have a good time.

Halloween Is Over

As I parked at McDruggie's the mighty, shirtless King Of Douche passed by with the shirtless Duke of Douche and his cousin the shirtless Earl of Douche and I knew this night would be a busted mess. Then I remembered that the time change happened at 2am...double whammy... I should have taken an unpaid day off to party...not to mention the gothically delicious full moon backed by clouds like something you would see in a Halloween cartoon chastising me for not following my dark side. And so it begins.


It was relatively quiet so we got warehouse totes put away then a call came in. My tech was laughing cuz he pretty much knew what I was going to say when he handed me the phone. A lady had a Levaquin 750mg stuck in her throat. On further questioning it was actually about half way down her esophagus so there was no danger of choking to death. She tried eating something, drinking something and gagging herself to no avail. She wanted ipecac but I haven't seen that in several months so it is probably on back order or no longer available so I told her the only other options were to continue drinking water, call the paramedics or go to the hospital. She opted to go to her doctor's house that was 2 doors down. I bet her doc was not ready for that "Trick or Treat" to show up on his doorstep. Want some candy, little girl?

I was reading an email about the decrease in controlled substances being filled and it reminded us that we are not to turn away every controlled substance that does not follow the new regulations in Florida. The law requires that the quantity must be written as a number and a word so as to prevent the temptation for a drug seeker to alter the numbers and we should call the doc offices to verify this. I fought the urge to send an email back letting them know that the decrease in controlled substance prescriptions was not due to this but due to many pill mill pain clinics being shut down and the refusal of many pharmacists to fill pain management rxs from similar clinics with patients from out of state. Hello, Mcfly?

Two older gentlemen with accents that place them as natives from the fjord lands were wanting to know if they could get Cialis, Levitra, or Viagra. I explained that in America you need a prescription for these items. They were disappointed but their accents reminded me of Alexander Skarsgard the sexy vampire Eric on True Blood and the only reason I watch the show... He would be my Trick and my Treat!

A real monster showed up in the form of shingles. It was not any shingles attack I had ever witnessed before. The guy's scalp and face were full of lesions and his left eye was extremely swollen. He was in severe pain and the ER had given him Demerol and gabapentin along with Valtrex. He had been given Demerol at the hospital 3 hours prior to his pharmacy visit and was still in great pain. I got them out in 5 minutes and advised him on when to start each med. He was happy to be leaving but noticed our sign for the shingles vaccine. He lamented that it would have been nice to know about the vaccine a few weeks ago.

It was sad but he reminded me of Sloth from the Goonies and that reminded me of high school. I had a friend who used to torture this guy because he was chubby and had a weird shaped skull so he kind of looked like Sloth. She would shove Baby Ruth wrappers through the slots in the top of his locker and whenever she saw him in the hall she would say "Baby Ruth...Sloth want Baby Ruth." I am actually surprised he didn't beat the crap out of her because that went on for several years. There was also a time in grade school when she had to apologize to a girl for making fun of her a lot because her hair was greasy and had a lot of dandruff so my friend would call her "fried chicken head." Misty water colored memories on the corners of my mind...

I also have to thank my boss for coming in and not making me stay for hour twelve due to the time change. One of his few redeeming qualities. So I got to go home and prepare to sit through the V marathon on Scyfy before the remake starts this week. So I leave you with this advice: If aliens show up that kind of look like us but talk funny we are gonna get eaten like snausages at a dog park!

Thanks Fellow RPh (more fan mail)

I enjoy reading your blogs. I've been in retail since 1963. Retired and doing some part time work at stores where I have a fun time only! I have also been doing medical missions to Haiti which are professionally rewarding.
Please keep the blogs coming!

Ed M

Fan Mail

Thanks CJ!

I just want to say I love all of you. I really do. When the weird world that is retail starts getting to me, I always feel better after reading your contributions. It just reminds me that weirdness abounds, wherever you go. Somehow, knowing that other people are dealing with the bizarre and often unreasonable demands required by "dealing with the public" makes me feel a lot better.

Thanks

Say What???

A guy came in to the pharmacy and was totally serious when he showed me a box of One A Day vitamins and asked me how to take them. I had to bite my tongue not to laugh as I explained that he should "take one tablet one time each day" like it says on the box.

A lady came in with a prescription for Tamiflu suspension. She didn't have the child's medicaid card but had 6 other family members' cards in her wallet. WTF did you give them at the ER? I was not having any of it. I was simply too busy to spend 45 minutes of my time getting the ID number from the automated system. So I told her the cash price and that I would fill it but she needed to get me the ID number. If you can't get your sh*t together when all you have to do is have a f*cking plastic card in your wallet I am not even going to go the extra mile. You don't deserve it! Of course this was too overwhelming for her so she took the rx back to go to Target the next morning. They probably have the time to waste on the call since they only do about 150/day at a busy store. (Can't help but say I am a bit jealous.)

I covered at another store that is an unholy nightmare to work at. The late shift tech and the next morning shift tech called in sick. Lucky me! At that same store one of the few techs who is very good at the job and would stay and help out got written up by the head store manager for working 30 minutes of overtime without his permission. What a douche! Why punish the only people willing to give up their free time to help your pharmacy which helps your bonus. Again, what a douche!

I had a lady with a Vicodin rx from the emergency room. I filled the rx and she was 24 cents short of the copay so she asked me if I could just take one tablet out and adjust the price. I told her not to worry about it and threw in a quarter that someone dropped on the floor earlier in the day. A junkie would have demanded we give the extra tab for free but I got a good chuckle out of her request because that is the first time I ever had someone tell me to take just one tablet out.

Just in time for your holiday shopping pleasure we got Chia pets, the Clapper, and Snoggies (Snuggies for small dogs).

A busted tranny with a UTI dropped off rxs in the drive thru. (By busted I mean that he wasn't really fooling anyone in to believing she wasn't a man underneath the face paint and overstuffed lips.) He/she then asked if I had a book of matches. Why on earth would I have matches in the pharmacy? I thought everyone knew I was not allowed to play with fire or sharp pointy objects.

A guy came in because his baby had a fever and he got some Tylenol infant drops. He asked if it would be okay to mix with Gatorade. NNNNNNOOOOOOOooooooo!!!!! Pedialyte, never Gatorade, because something formulated for a large sweaty sportsman is definitely not good to give to a teeny tiny infant.

A lady came in at 4am because her Medicaid denied the inhalers she had discharge rxs for from her most recent hospital stay as refill too soon until that particular date. She had severe COPD, was only in her early 40's, had a BIC lighter in hand, and reeked of cigarettes. Somebody didn't learn her lesson. When your lungs can't take in air to the point that it causes you great pain and keeps you from walking from your car to the pharmacy without having airway spasms and choking I don't feel sorry for you. You obviously "need" those cigarettes more than you "need" to breathe. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

They're Always After Me Lucky Charms!

My manager e-mailed this article to me.

Man Gets 15 Years for Stealing Cereal
by UPI [11:33 am et 10/6/09]

A homeless alcoholic has been sentenced to 15 years in prison for stealing milk and a box of Lucky Charms, authorities in Lakeland, Fla. said. Mark Griffin's sentence was influenced by previous felony convictions for burglary and grand theft, prosecutors told The (Lakeland, Fla.) Ledger.

Griffin's most recent arrest came April 19 for stealing a $4.49 box of Lucky Charms cereal and a $1.59 can of milk from a Walgreens, police said. Griffin had been banned from the store previously.

A jury in August convicted Griffin of robbery and trespassing after he rejected a plea deal in which prosecutors offered him a sentence of three years in prison and two years probation, The Ledger reported.

Acknowledging Griffin was a chronic alcoholic, Circuit Judge Donald Jacobsen said he was mandated by law to impose the 15-year prison sentence. "Personally, I think the money could have been better spent in treatment than incarceration for 15 years, but that is not my decision," Jacobsen said.

I find it tragic that someone lets addiction take them to the point of theft and homelessness. On the bright side he gets free food, a place to sleep, a toilet, bathing privileges, free cable, and workout time paid for by John and Jane Q. Taxpayer. Life is sweet! (and yes Lucky Charms are delicious!)

iPhone apps sent in by reader

Thanks man!

http://blog.onlinecollegeguru.com/health-care/best-iphone-apps-for-pharmacists/